This post is part of my special Coaching Tips Series. This series was inspired by my clients and the core themes in their challenges. When we can apply these tips, we bring a lot of ease into our lives and step into our leadership.
In my coaching practice, I work with a lot of high performing, high achieving people who get things done. And there is a common practice that they all tend to skip – and it’s holding them back.
The Missing Ingredient
Firstly, this is an important distinction I want to make. When we use words like high performing and high achieving, it tends to conjure up an image of driven, intense people. A types. But in real life, that’s not what I see. Calm, relaxed, easy-going people get things done too. Flighty, all over the place, people get things done too.
Okay, stepping off my soapbox now.
Whatever the personality type, whatever the energy of the person in front of me, there is a common factor. It’s about how they are with achievement.
This is the question I ask that reveals all:
“So how did you celebrate this achievement?”
You can see where this is going, right? They all say the same thing.
“I didn’t really”.
This is a universal thing that I’m seeing, and I used to be this way too.
We set our sights on a goal, we often link that goal to a Purpose we have for ourselves and our organisations. We develop a strategy, tactics. We have our action plans and we work hard.
We come across obstacles, unexpected bumps and disasters, we engage our creativity and agility, and we solve as we go.
Finally, we get to the endpoint and we’ve done it!
And what do we do then?
We talk about the next goal. We move on to the next thing.
(Companies are the worst culprits. What happens when we work in a company and we meet our targets, hit our goals? We get given new targets, straight away. Almost in the same breath, “You broke records, great job, now here’s another harder goal”).
What happened to celebrating our successes?
While I have theories on this, what I want to focus on is encouraging you to celebrate your successes.
That’s a common challenge, how do I celebrate my achievement?
Automatically we think of a big celebration: party, fancy dinner, lots of people involved. Making a statement.
And that’s great for some circumstances. But there are so many ways to celebrate.
The actual secret
You can make any activity into a celebration. How? Do something you enjoy, and do it in the name of celebrating your success and achievement.
One of my favourite ways to celebrate is to have a cup of tea, and think about what I have achieved. I let the enjoyment in, and I allow myself to slow down and feel it. It’s the best cup of tea. Ever.
Why is this so important?
When we keep going, doing more and more and more, then when is enough? Will we ever get there? When are we done?
We get fatigued. We stall. We become dissatisfied.
If you pay attention to people who keep going and succeed and seem happy despite all the challenges, you’ll notice that they do this one thing: they celebrate along the way.
Tell me how you celebrate, I love hearing about this.