Why Difficult Conversations Are A Gift

by | Nov 17, 2021 | Thought Piece Series | 0 comments

I’ve been having a lot of difficult conversations lately, mostly with my youngest.
Karma has been good to me: my kid is just like me.

Ok, I don’t really think karma has been good to me. I think karma is teaching me a lesson, and the lesson is “oh my god, I can be soooo annoying”. I am so sorry to all those people in my past, and present, for all the stubborn, “not going to let this go” moments.

Let me reframe this. Being on the receiving end of:

  • persistence
  • passionate objections
  • fighting for a cause
  • continuous improvement

can be hard. And I’m ok that we had hard conversations, even when it was soooo annoying, because the purpose was to make things better.

The intentions were good, my execution was… not so good.

Yet those interactions were some of the most beautiful interactions in my life.
When we got into it, when we said what we thought respectfully and truthfully, the impact was transformational.
It was messy, but the result was:

  • common understanding
  • empathy
  • real solutions (i.e. fix the actual problem, not what we think the problem is)
  • increased closeness
  • trust

There’s no better measure of trust than being able to get into it with someone, and still like and respect each other afterwards.

These are the gifts of difficult conversations.
They are so worth it.

Back to my kid.
So these difficult conversations I’m having with my kid… we’re getting closer. Trust is being built: we can talk about anything.
We’re getting to the heart of the matter, so we can actually do something productively and useful about the issues.

And it reminds me of this image my friend sent me about the Muppets.

While they weren’t very good at singing, or hosting, they went at it with enthusiasm and joy. And they created the impact they were aiming for: good entertainment.

So don’t worry about doing it right, just start having those difficult conversations.

This is part of my Thought Piece Series where I explore topics related to leadership and provide both answers and questions. My intention is to start meaningful conversations that help us move forward. Want to connect? Click here

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